Look on the Brightside

So I'm at medical school; what I've been aiming towards for a good few years. I've had a great Fresher's week - and I'm still alive. I like my flatmates, I like my room, I like my course, I've met loads of people. I don't mean to always moan, I know how amazing it is that I'm here, and I am glad to be here. That doesn't stop that it feels...off. Like something's missing. Everyone's nice, but I don't have a best friend. That's stupid, cause actually I have lots of best friends - the best friends in the entire world. They just don't happen to be at this university. Also, I've been here a week; who makes best friends in a week?! I have far too hight expectations, these things take time. I feel slightly out of it: my flatmates seem more together, I sometimes feel like I'm hovering on the edge. Only sometimes though, sometimes I feel like I fit in perfectly, and we're all laughing about Ben casually saying he could have malaria, and putting post-it notes on our window to write Flat 147. It's too much to expect everyone to come perfectly together in one week. I didn't make the friends I have now in a week. Calm down. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't homesick at all. It only really hit me tonight, I'd been too busy to consider it. Then I got this lonely feeling, and just wanted to be able to have a hug and someone make me dinner. Guess it's a it pathetic, but then again, maybe everyone had moments like this: who says it's just me? The course is so overwhelming. There is so much to learn, I got so caught up in starting a degree, that I forgot you actually have to learn something. I'm still not quite sure on the lecture from earlier, but that may be due to me being half asleep in it. Need to not do that. I ordered a histology book, and I have the anatomy one already. I do need the cell one, but everyone says not to buy it, so I might try to find it in the library. Deep down, I know it'll work out and come together, but right now...it's all a bit much, and I just want my mom. Even at eighteen. Ah well. In the interest of remaining awake during lectures tomorrow, this will be continued at a later date.